Disappointing The Feeling Of Disappointment - by Thomas Fernandez
Disappointment is a word that can cause a range of emotions. From mildly let down to gut wrenching, heartbreaking pain, disappointment can hit every step on the emotional roller coaster. It is something that I have struggled with on a very personal level.
That dream life planned? Never happened. That new car or job? Couldn’t get it. Letting my friends and family down? Seems like an every day occurrence. That date that never called back? Yup, disappointing. And not only are all of these things disappointing, they start to wear on a person.
Seems like another word that is the Bonnie to disappointment’s Clyde is despair. Get disappointed enough and one starts to despair. The littlest task seems impossible and the joy just seems to be sucked out as the reflection of each failure stems from the disappointing feeling. It’s not a pretty sight. Some may sit at home in gym shorts with a bag of Cheetos, staring vaguely at the TV while watching reruns or playing video games as a way to cope while becoming numb and apathetic to your surroundings. (Aside: I may or may not have done this, but I digress.)
But realistically, why let disappointment and despair win? It doesn’t have to win. There are ways to beat that feeling of disappointment that involve less Cheetos and are a bit more useful than gazing at empty space.
The Bible actually talks about disappointment in a roundabout way and while thinking about this topic, I found some interesting verses that take a completely new meaning in regards to the “war on disappointment.” The idea is that we have to go through a process when it comes to disappointment.
Step One: Go ahead grieve, rant and rave. It actually helps beat disappointment.
The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18
Weeping may last through the night, but joy comes with the morning. Psalm 30:5
Yeah that’s right, cry about it, yell about it. Let it all out. Why? Because God is right there with you, with each tear and each frustrating shout as you get upset about the disappointment. Be in the place of grieving, upsetness or frustration because God is there with you and me as we handle each of our disappointments. Be in that place because that’s the only way to heal, really. But remember that we don’t have to be stuck in that place.
Step Two: Pray about it—and listen.
Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7
It’s always funny when sometimes we go through a tough time and try to do the “woe is me” routine, we actually ignore the fact that we have a heavenly Father who we can take our issues to when we are hurting, upset, happy or disappointed. Yeah, I struggle with this greatly. I don’t take my concerns to God. Instead I fume, rant, and rave about it including my personal favorite—anxiously worrying myself to death. When we pray to God, He isn’t a magical genie, but like the verse says we experience peace in Him. Along with praying, listen to what He is trying to do. God would like to get a word in too sometime.
Step Three: Believe in yourself because God does.
Quick question: Has anyone ever argued with God and proved Him wrong? Yeah… I can’t remember the last time the Creator of the universe lost an argument or was proven wrong. So when the Man says that He believes in you so you should believe in you…well maybe it’s a good idea to listen. God doesn’t want to see us fail or fall into despair—nor would any parent really. God wants us to succeed and be happy because He believes in us. In order for all that awesome to happen, we need to believe in ourselves. It’s so easy to not believe because we know all of our good and bad sides, but newsflash: God knows that too!
And the Apostle Paul with the obligatory mic drop on this subject:
For I can do all things through Christ, who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13
Yes disappointment can be frustrating and seems to crop up in some of our lives every single day. It’s not going to go away though and we shouldn’t just accept it either.
Instead of letting the demons of disappointment define who we are, we should instead disappoint the feeling of disappointment.